railroadsoftware:

me: (farts right before leaving a store)
my girlfriend: oh wait I want to look at this one last thing
me: no we got to go right now

pudingu:

It took me 18 years to realise Saturday has turd in it

kelekelo:

every class is art class if you dont care enough

shrekjpeg:

when u excited about something and ur friend isntimage

lucyliunareclipse:

american horror story: asylum

bombing:

one of my favorite things is when you give a baby your finger and they hold on to it as tight as they can. it’s funny because they don’t even come close to having the amount of muscle power i do. do you really think you can hold me here haha. i’ll crush you

"...All humans live with the wrong assumptions.."

blurrys:

chill hazel grace its a metaphor

burgerkid:

burgerkid:

burgerkid:

Who does a pharaoh talk to when he’s sad?

His mummy.

i lost 10 followers already

bootycaller:

who wants to give up on society and go live in a treehouse with me

lumos5001:

sterlingkato:

MEMO: The space bar is important. 

also punctuation placement 

servantofsadako:

Who wants to sit at the cool kids table when you can sit at the duel kids table?

image

urtube:

How long after arriving at someone’s house is it appropriate to ask for the WiFi password?